A Night to Remember

If the present incarnation of the GOP resembled the old in any way save the name, we might be in for two years of talk of tax reform, immigration reform, that sort of thing. What we’ll get, along those lines, is tax reform where business pays even less and immigration reform along the lines of deport all the Mexicans to Mexico and all the Chinamen to China. ¡Reform!

That’s if we’re lucky.

What we’re likely to get is two years of what the GOP is now expert at delivering…

  • An amendment making Christianity the Official Religion™ of these here United States
  • An amendment making abortion illegal on Earth, Mars, and the outer rings of Saturn
  • A murder of Representatives filing bills to make every other day Bible Day
  • An amendment making Englush* the Official Language of these here United States
  • An amendment requiring Ebolas to have two forms of ID to vote
  • An amendment outlawing the Gays
  • An amendment abolishing evolushun and making Creationism official
  • A race ’tween the House and Senate to see how many times they can repeal Obummercare
  • A race ’tween the House and Senate to see how many things they can name for Ronald Reagan
  • A race to see how many times they can bring Donald Trump to full orgasm

On one of the Sunday TeeVee talk shows little Billy Kristol—no, not THAT Billy Crystal, the other one, Irving and Gert’s boy—gave utterance to his fear that if the GOP takes the Senate, they’ll actually have to govern. Well they did, and now they will. Except what they call governing, the rest call a Marx Brothers’ film, and tonight, ladies and gentleman, the part of Harpo and his magic horn will be portrayed by Mr. McConnell.

Now everybody—

P.S. Joni Ernst is going to be a blast. Michele Bachmann may be gone, but now we’ve got Joni, who appears to be even crazier.

* they may turn out their base, but they still can’t spell for shit.


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